Mic Check

Why is it that no guest speakers can seem to figure out the microphone/speaker correlation?

These people speak publicly for a living. You'd think they'd know that standing right beside the speaker creates the sort of feedback which would make Angus Young proud. Yet, somehow, none of them seem to understand this very simple dynamic.

So now I've got a splitting headache and patrons complaining about our shoddy equipment at all of our events. Headaches and patrons are not a good combination. I've been trying to tell them, in as kind a manner possible, that the equipment is fine and the guest speakers are a bunch of idiots.

So far, this approach seems to be working; instead of knocking our equipment, people are now requesting we get intelligent guest speakers who actually know how to use the equipment.

That means the program-attending public is now open to new forms of programming, which in turn allows us to become more creative with what we offer. As a result, staff morale is at an all-time high.

Ah, the power of negative spin. Don't ever underestimate its benefits.